Waiting in the Quiet

Sometimes the most stressful times in life is when nothing particularly stressful is currently happening.  It is the worry and anticipation in the quiet of times.. waiting to see if the stressful time will come that can be stressful.  If the stress comes I tend to get into 'fix-it' mode, make '3 choices' list with pros and cons, and make a decision on what to do.  But when you don't know what the situation is you cant do that...  you've just got to wait.

Imagination

Kids and be so imaginative.  Olivia's Auntie Carrie wrote this on her facebook wall... (this is a good look into what we get to experience everyday with Olivia!)

"Little kids are the most entertaining people on the planet. I just watched my 2-year-old niece pull imaginary sticky tape out of her imaginary bag to fix her imaginary fishing pole that an imaginary bear broke. All while her imaginary monkey stood on her foot, she explained."

If you can't tell what she is referring to... she has been watching a lot of Dora the Explorer lately.  She she had a permanent, imaginary backpack on her back filled with things like sticky tape and cookies. And she has been carrying Dora and Boots the money with her at all times to play with her.  She is such a silly girl  :)

For God!

I have some pretty awesome children.  Olivia drew a picture of her self that looked kinda crazy (shes only two!).  She explained everything to Clint showing him the eyes, hair, legs, etc.  She said that she didn't draw ears... She didn't need them.  So Clint took that little opportunity for an anatomy lesson and asked Olivia what ears are for.  Olivia said "God!  To listen for God!"  She has such a tender heart.  Who knew that we would learn a little something by Olivia's crazy drawing

Life and Death

There are some things that are mysteries to me.  Life and death are strange bedfellows.  The last few days I've been to two memorial services.  The first was for my best friend's grandmother.  She was a wonderful person - odd, bold, a little crazy... but wonderful.  She is the woman who took my best friend to church as a little girl and that church is where we were able to start our relationship that has now lasted almost 20 years.  The other lady who passed away died of Alzheimers around age 55.  She mentored me when I was a junior and senior in high school.  She was a counselor at my church and we spent a lot of time together discussing what I wanted to go into at college.

At both of these wonderful lady's memorial services, I was thinking of my 2 1/2 week old little girl.  Two wonder lives have ended and another was just beginning.

Daddy Date!

1/20/2012

For several days Clint has been talking to Olivia about having a Daddy Date to see get a special drink from the coffee shop and see Star Wars in 3D.  He told her that they would have this special date when we got home from the hospital and that it is something that only Olivia and he could do because Alle is just a baby.

So today is the day.  Olivia has been so excited.  Every day she says she is ready for her date with daddy!  Olivia said she wanted a cheese taco so Clint went to get gas in the car, cash for the movie, and cheese roll-up from Taco Bell.  He met us at Beans and Strings to let Olivia pick out whatever 'pecial' drink she wanted.  She took Clint into the bathroom to show him the poster of smoothies.

Olivia gave be a hug bye bye and left with her daddy!  I'm so excited for her.  I know they will both have a great time.  Since they are gone, Alle and I have the night to ourselves.  We are chillin, watching Hulu, catching up on this blog, and just enjoying each others company.

I think it is so great that I have such a wonderful husband and he is such a great father.  He has been so sweet to our girls this past week.  He has been spending extra time with Olivia and holding Alle when she cries.  She always calms down when she is in her daddy's arms and he sings to her.  I'm looking forward to seeing our new little family evolve and grow together.

First Day as a Family

2/18/2012

Olivia came home today.  She had been staying with her Granny and Granddaddy and then with Nana and Granddad.  We saw her everyday but just for a visit.  I was a little nervous about her coming home.

When she came to visit yesterday and the day before it was odd.  Olivia seemed distant and wanting to leave.  It was like she was feeling I was someone else's mommy now - which I guess I am.  I just wasn't feeling like I was being a good mother to her and felt guilty enjoying alone time with Alle.  I knelt down to talk to her and sat on a pillow for only a few minutes but I was in pain for a couple of hours afterwards from doing that.  If I can't even sit on the floor for a few minutes then how will I be able to read to her and play with her?

Well it was time for my mom to drop her off at our house.  She didn't stay long because we were running late for Alle's pictures at Auntie Carrie's studio.  Olivia went with us and was a pretty good girl.  She didn't want to be in any of the pics but Auntie Carrie snuck a few anyways.  Olivia brought her little bunny rabbit with her and fed it to the dinosaur.  it was pretty funny when Clint went in and say some bunny feet hanging from the dinos mouth.

Alle's first outing!

We want to make sure Olivia feels special and not left out so we let her pick out where she wanted to eat for lunch.  She said she wanted 2 BIG cheeseburgers.  So we took our four day old baby and our almost three year old to Wendys.  I'm glad that we aren't super paranoid over stuff like taking our baby out before 2 months old.

I was able to take a nap with both of my little girls watching Tangled.  It was awesome to just enjoy watching the two of them sleeping.  We bought Olivia a special gift.  We got her a baby doll with a diaper bag filled with a paci, a bottle, extra clothes, etc.  She played with it during the afternoon.  She put the baby in the bouncer, and fed her, and rocked her.  It is her baby.  I didn't want to spend the evening telling Olivia to 'go play' or sitting her in front of a movie, so we decided to bake cookies.

Olivia stood in a chair and helped stir all the ingredients.  She was actually helping and stayed the entire time to help.  I had to go feed Alle so Olivia and her daddy rolled the dough into balls.  They also made a gingerbread man and when Clint asked her what else she wanted to make, she said a cow.  So they made a funky looking cow that when it was in the oven, turned into a big blob along with with gingerbread man.  It was so sweet listening to the two of them talking about how to make the man and the cow and what shapes they needed to add next.  We all sat down and had milk and cookies.

When Olivia went to bed she asked to sleep in teh bed with me.  I told her she couldn't so she said 'I will go to your bed in the mornin time ok'.  A few minutes after I left her room Alle started to cry and we heard Olivia yell out 'baby crying!'  She is already a good big sister and it will be awesome to see them grow up together.

Night night baby sissy!

Past Due

So today I am two days past my due date.  It is a strange thing.. for months now, the date 'February 9th' has been on my mind.  That has come and gone and where am I now?  In a waiting game... not knowing what to expect.  I've been having contractions that feel like cramps the last two nights.  My doctor gave me some tips if I want to speed up going into labor and said to just time them and if they are 5 minutes apart then to head to the hospital.  When she asked if I wanted to go into labor this weekend or try to rest and wait till Monday (when I go in to be induced), I just said that I don't know.

Even though I have a wonderful, beautiful little two year old, I feel like a first time mom when it comes to labor.  I didn't go into labor anywhere but at the hospital hooked up to monitors when I was induced with Olivia.  Even though people say that being induced makes it harder, there is also security and comfort in knowing that even if I don't know what I'm doing, there is a nurse right there who can help me.

So even though I am 2 days past due and have been having some minor contractions off and on and am tired of being huge and not sleeping well and want to meet baby Alle..... I'm also a little scared and don't feel ready yet.  I kind of want to wait until I go into the hospital Monday night so I can have my house clean, Olivia's bag ready with everything she needs, and our bag with all our electronics and such.  It will give me several hours to know what to expect next instead of not knowing and just waiting.

Strange I know... But that is where I am... two days past due...